Flood of T's and TR.

After coming back to my parents house, I have been hit with a flood of signs.

The same signs I was seeing months prior- which I wrote about in my "Mr. T" blog.. those signs are back.

I am seeing it literally everywhere.

Every single place I look I see T or TR or my initials paired with T/TR.

I also see a specific location along with these letters over and over.

I’m not going to lie… every time I notice it, my heart drops.

Because I’m still attached to the idea of Rafiq.I’m still in love with him.

When these signs show up, it feels like a pang. My heart resists the idea of someone new. It almost feels like betrayal- like my heart is refusing to move on.

But it keeps happening.

Allah continues showing it to me.. literally everywhere.

The more I don't want to see it, the more I do.

Before, I may have ignored it off and thought that Allah is testing me- but now it's too much to ignore. At this point, I am actually starting to believe that there is some truth to this..

Maybe whatever happened between us… that was the full story. Maybe that was its ending.

It hurts to even write that. It feels like closing a book I never wanted to finish.

t's heartbreaking to imagine, but what else could it be? I have prayed so much about it and no door is opening. Infact, I rarely see signs fo him or Tehran anymore.

Anywhere I look, I see these new signs.

And maybe the hardest part isn’t letting him go.

Maybe it’s accepting that Allah might be writing a different name in my story.